I'm bored now..just wanted to hear some jokes from all of you

I have bought a very nice jokes book, and i like to share some with you all

Teacher:give me three reasons why the world is round.
Student:Well, my dad say so, my mum say so and you say so!
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Teacher:Only an idiot is damn sure of anything he say.
Student:Are you sure, sir?
Teacher:Of course I am.
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Teacher:Give me an example of hypocrite?
Student:A student goes to school with a smile on his face
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Teacher:The human brain is a wonderful thing.Why do you say that?
Student:Because it starts working the second you get up in the morning and never stops until you are asked a question in class!
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Teacher:Give me sentence with an object.
Student:You are very beautiful, Madam.
Teacher:What is the object?
Student:A good grade.
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A teacher wrote on the blackboard,"I ain't had any fun all summer."
Teacher:What shall I do to correct this?
Student:Get a boy friend.
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Teacher:What is a cannibal?
Student:I do not know, Sir!
Teacher:Suppose you eat your father and mother, what would you be then?
Student:an orphan, Sir!
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Student:Can a student be punished for what he had not done, Sir?
Teacher:No, of course 1not.
Student:Well, I have not done my homework.
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This is all for now, but I'll write more after this

Teacher:Why did you hit your companion with a chair?
Student:Because the table was too heavy
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Teacher:What shape is this world?
Student, looking wise and happy, beamed at her:It's in a terrible shape, my dad says.
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AMUSING DEFINATIONS
Actor---A man who tries to be everything except himself.
Boss---Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early
Friend---Someone who has the same enemies as you

Last edited by himitsu_ongaku (14 Apr, 2009 1:22 am)